Three Habits of Highly Self-Defeating People

Most of us have read books informing us of the habits of  highly successful people. We know that in order to be successful, we must  program our minds for success and we also know that particular mindset doesn’t  always come easily. I think it is equally important to know the habits we  should NOT embrace. I call these the habits of highly self-defeating people.

1. Always compare yourself to others.  This is a great way to feel lousy about yourself! If you measure your  every accomplishment against someone else, you will probably always be  successful in finding some shortcoming in your own performance.  This is because you are NOT someone else and  someone else is NOT you!  Every one of us  has a unique personality, style and talent. Modeling a successful person whose  accomplishments you respect is one thing but it is important to realize that  you cannot live anyone else’s life because they are already living it, so blaze  your own trail!     

 2. Always expect the worst and you will never be disappointed…and make sure  you always panic.  These are trying times and everyone  loves to talk about how we’re going down for the count! Watching the news will  straighten your hair if it’s curly and curl your hair if it’s straight! You  can’t pick up a magazine without seeing a headline about impending doom and it  is getting tougher to muster up any optimism.  Now is the time to just say “no” to despair! Panic doesn’t help anything  and it makes you look like a deranged squirrel. We attract what we most often  think about so if we expect failure and angst to come knocking at the door, we  will probably find it on our front porch. Maintaining an optimistic attitude  doesn’t mean believing that everything will be rosy; it means entertaining  alternate possibilities, fostering creative ways to meet challenges and being  proactive in your own success!   

  3.  Keep old feelings of past failure, guilt, fear and other bad things alive  and in the frontal lobe of your brain at all times….and don’t forget the  negative self-talk!  To maintain that fearful feeling of  never being good enough, be sure to constantly conjure up and nurture your past  woes. Right? WRONG!  You cannot move ahead while looking backward. Don’t allow  your mistakes to define your worth or dictate your future.  Fight the urge to relive the past. Get off of  the hamster wheel that keeps you on the same track and take a different path  with a different attitude! Refrain from reminding yourself daily that you do  not deserve any good things and treat yourself with respect.  Deal with the situations at hand, glean the good “stuff” from your past failures, do the best  you can and don’t rent your brain cells out to negativity! Above all….don’t be  your worst enemy! You may as well like yourself because wherever you go…there  you are!

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One Response to “Three Habits of Highly Self-Defeating People”

  1. Edward Hotspur Says:

    These are all so true! Another is “Always want something different from what you have.”
    If your boobs are big, want small ones. If small, want big ones. If your hair is straight, make it curly. If curly, make it straight. If you have short hair, grow it out, but if it’s long, cut it! Dress up if you’re grubby, but relax and wear comfortable clothes if you’re a fashion plate! Tan if you’re pale, but if you’re tan, you’re too dark.

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